Vicar's Family in Training » power http://www.vicarsfamilyintraining.org.uk on being the family of a woman training to be a priest in the Church of England Thu, 09 Sep 2010 00:20:23 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 Love, Honour and Obey, with red shoes http://www.vicarsfamilyintraining.org.uk/archives/55 http://www.vicarsfamilyintraining.org.uk/archives/55#comments Fri, 20 Nov 2009 22:26:36 +0000 husband http://www.vicarsfamilyintraining.org.uk/?p=55

When VIT and I got married she promised to Love, Honour and Obey me.  (Yeah, don’t laugh but she did, wearing her red shoes and looking fabulous.)  I had just promised to Love, Honour and Worship her.  Whether or not you like the idea of a woman promising to obey her husband, there is a [...]]]> red shoes

When VIT and I got married she promised to Love, Honour and Obey me.  (Yeah, don’t laugh but she did, wearing her red shoes and looking fabulous.)  I had just promised to Love, Honour and Worship her.  Whether or not you like the idea of a woman promising to obey her husband, there is a mutuality about this promise – she has to obey me ;) – but I have to worship her.  Hold on to that thought for a moment.

No one tells you when your other half becomes a VIT quite how much control is surrendered. Their own control over their life, and the VFITs over theirs.    It’s partly practical – “you shall be at Morning Prayer” – but that’s really only a sign of something much bigger.

When someone is ordained (or when they’re licenced as a reader) they have to promise to obey their bishop “in all things lawful and godly.”  Most parts of the church take this promise very seriously indeed.  This requirement for obedience appears to extend to ordinands too, although VIT (as an ordinand) has never formally had to swear any oath of obedience.

So, here’s a question.  Has the church thought about the mutuality of this obedience?  Will the church, and its leaders in particular, worship their ordinands in return?

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]]> http://www.vicarsfamilyintraining.org.uk/archives/55/feed 1 Political suppression http://www.vicarsfamilyintraining.org.uk/archives/51 http://www.vicarsfamilyintraining.org.uk/archives/51#comments Thu, 19 Nov 2009 09:39:07 +0000 husband http://www.vicarsfamilyintraining.org.uk/?p=51 I’ve been trying to write a blog about vocation, interference, arrogance, uninformed decisions relayed by third parties, complete lack of negotiation on the part of someone who does not know all the facts and can’t be bothered to find out.  And then I gave up since saying what I actually think at the moment would [...]]]> dark_sideI’ve been trying to write a blog about vocation, interference, arrogance, uninformed decisions relayed by third parties, complete lack of negotiation on the part of someone who does not know all the facts and can’t be bothered to find out.  And then I gave up since saying what I actually think at the moment would probably not be politically advisable.  I have therefore suppressed myself – at least a bit.

Back to Pink Floyd again: Dark Side of the Moon this time.

“I’ve always been mad,
I know I’ve been mad, like the most of us are…
very hard to explain why you’re mad,
even if you’re not mad…”

If accused of being mad, it’s just as hard to explain that you are not mad, since trying to prove it only underlines your need to prove you are not mad, which must mean you are mad.

This is directed at the C of E, not Coverdale Hall by the way.  They’re mostly still wonderful.

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