Ever since I’ve known the Vicar in Training (VIT for short) she’s wanted to be a priest – no, more than that – she’s felt this inexplicable “call” to priesthood. It won’t go away. If she’d been applying for any other job she’d have told the Church of England to get stuffed long, long ago. But God is more persisent than that. So finally, 25 years after we met, and 22 after we married, she’s an Ordinand. This means she’s training to be a priest, and that means that the rest of us; husband, three kids, a dog and a cat are the Vicar’s Family in Training – or VFIT for short. (Actually that’s the registration of one of Richard Branson’s planes – but aviation can wait till later.) It’s going to take some adjustment, practically and emotionally.
The kind people at the training college – let’s call it Coverdale Hall – have arranged a thing for spouses (I guess there aren’t too many unmarried partners…) and in some cases their multiple and quite often small children. But as a forty-something male with a job which requires being away a lot I am not sure that a coffee morning with small kids (been there, done that, love that my children are growing up) or a morning Bible Study is going to do it for me. But that’s not to diss the idea completely. This, the welcome dinner, the fact that families can eat in college any time and for no extra charge, and the evening the college laid on explicitly for spouses, all adds up to the most pastorally sensitive things any church body formally involved in this process has done to this VHIT (work it out) for some time. So, initial reaction is BIG TICK TO COVERDALE HALL.
Tomorrow begins a new test: I’m away for nearly 48 hours for work. Can the VIT and the VKITs (I’m sure you can work that one out too) cope? I’m quite sure they can, but the logistics and the emotions are different to when VIT was simply at work.
And I’m genuinely grateful for the invitation to the coffee morning. Honest.
Had exactly the same experience when my spouse became a VIT. Juggling for morning prayer tested the idea of support when i was trying to get myself and my daughter to 2 different schools and my son to the child minder- all in different directions. The sunday pattern when on placement was also interesting. Was I on placement too? We did a free Christmas dinner ie a pair of pheasants shot by the church warden though which helped!
Hi,
Not sure if you’ll ever see this but if you do could you ask your wife if she is glad that she waited to become a vicar? I’m 24 and, as like it sounds like your wife did, have felt a call to ordination for around 5 years now (on and off but always there). I have a good job, which could develop into a great career and am thinking of starting a family in the not-to-distant future but I’m thinking of starting to properly approach the road to ordination.
So I guess my question is, is she glad she waited or if she could go back would she go for it at a younger age?
Thanks
Allie
ps obviously assuming allowing women priests came along earlier!